Confession: I miss Fifth Harmony. I can’t help it. They remind me of when I was 12 and thought the world was in the palms of my hand. Their music is accompanied with memories of pleading in Justice for charms that were going to be chucked in the garbage the next day and thinking that Bath and Body was the height of luxury.
Yes, they were the music equivalent of having a sledgehammer hit over your head that seemed almost tailored made to be deprived from any actual meaning but it was in its own special way perfect.
So in theory I should like the newest single from the hottest new international girl group KATSEYE, “Internet Girl”. However, despite its intent of proving they’re the new IT girl, the single might more accurately prove the limits the group has without actual hits behind them to keep them afloat. Even worse, unlike previous hits that at least captured
some of the group’s charm in the choreography, Internet Girl doesn’t even have the steps to back it up, highlighting the massive waste of a promising girl group filled with all-star talents.
Meet KATSEYE
For those yet-to-be initiated EYEKONS, KATSEYE is a girl group consisting of six members. Each of them has an impressive career behind them starting from childhood, from singing with Michelle Obama to performing on America’s Got Talent, but each of them are able to hold their own in regards to singing and dancing. With that being said each member does carve out their particular niche within the group.
For example Lara is the main vocalist while Megan, Yoonchae, and Diavala are the main dancers. Sophia is the designated leader of the group and Manon is the visual which in Kpop girl groups means the “face of the group.”
Just from the breakdown itself you start to see one of the major issues with KATSEYE: it’s mostly focused on visuals. This is already seen in their debut song titled, “Debut”. It’s a good song, maybe even one of their best, catchy without being overpowering, soft enough to be played for retail and just a hint of brashness needed for any newcomer to the music game.
It could even, theoretically, be played on the radio without any extra visuals needed. The issue is that despite the name, the song could have been slapped onto any girl group, not necessarily KATSEYE. Thankfully, for now, though the next few singles, such as “Touch”, “Gabriela”, do still build off the momentum that the group has set for itself. However, the cracks are beginning to show and nothing really highlighted it more than “Gnarly”.
Lighting In a Bottle
If I were to compare “Internet Girl” to any of KATSEYE’s other singles it would be “Gnarly”. “Gnarly” like “Internet Girl” had a very controversial reception, with even its music video dampening fans spirit with images of flies and food being thrown everywhere. As one stan said underneath the video that seemed to encapsulate the spirit:
I, however, was immediately hooked. So many popstars keep trying to be sexy and polished but “Gnarly” was the first time I saw popstars that were polished trying to be dingy and grungy. Of course once the choreography officially came out I was vindicated in my reaction.
There is no way to describe the complete flip in the fandom from pre-choreo to post-choreo because the song went from loudly lambasted to being held up to icon status.
The fans realized what I did, that “Gnarly”, more so than “Debut”, made a strong case for KATSEYE. why their diversity is important as well as the inadvertent genius of placing many of their members into visuals. The choreo is a no-holds barred showcase of KATSEYE”S visual talent and makes a clear presentation on why having so many members focused on the performance side is an asset.
It makes a pretty strong case for why a song doesn’t necessarily need to be listenable for it to be good with the space where a good beat being instead replaced by iconic dance moves one after the next. It’s a tight choreo that showcases the personalities of the girls while still keeping them synchronized with each other. It’s the kind of song that you are supposed to make after you’re established, a reversal of your brand after you have spent a decade building it up.
A “joke” song that serves as a wink and nod to those who have followed you for so long. So for a debut group to play this song so early into their career, especially when their fandom is still budding, is a risk, especially from an industry that is known for playing it safe. However, it’s not a trick that could be pulled off twice and certainly not without the talent behind it.
When the Bops Don’t Land
The lack of actual, “bops” that KATSEYE has is starting to wear thin even with their die hard fans. You could even see this with “Gnarly” before the choreo came out with many grumbling about how their company (HBYE) keeps forcing these insanely talented women to sing nonsense songs. “Internet Girl”, though, was the final nail in the coffin. Just like previous singles, “Internet Girl” is not something that you can play on your Spotify and enjoy while driving your Tesla.
However, unlike previous songs, it doesn’t have the intense choreography that makes up for all it lacks in the lyrics. Even when comparing it to the lyrics of “Gnarly” that were mostly nonsense, they still drove at an idea specifically that there was a definition of “Gnarly” that KATSEYE was driving at, “Internet Girl” though is very clearly LOLZ RANDOM humour with lyrics like “Do you read me? Like the emoji?” and “Eat zucchini”.
It’s also a bold claim for a band to use such an out-of-touch song so close to the beginning of their career to claim they are THE “Internet Girl” when it’s not yet clear if they’re even next week’s mainstay.
Why Hatsune Miku Could Pull It Off
If I could say who exactly inspired “Internet Girl”, it would probably be HATSUNE MIKU. But the problem is that the reason HATSUNE MIKU could pull off this song while KATSEYE can’t is that despite the fact they can be swapped out and used for whatever project that the creator can twist them into at least MIKU was built into an actual brand.
KATSEYE does not have that–not yet. If KATSEYE wants to stay on the climb they need songs not just dance numbers. They might’ve been able to coast off the charisma of its members but sooner or later they need to put out tracks that people actually want to listen to even without the visuals.